Mot's blog

People you meet on the train/ plane.

As I mentioned in an earlier post - Eric and I made fast friends with our neighbor on our flight from Chicago. Cindy and I spent alot of time looking at her photos of Mexico. Very neat. Eric
made friends with the plane staff and managed to extract $60 worth of wine from the airline and was in a good and loud mood. He entertained Cindy quite a bit [ along with people around us]
The subject of Facebook came up and we discussed with Cindy about exchanging emails. After our plane landed, we walked with Cindy and helped with her camera bag until we found her family in baggage claim. Our friend Lynn soon found us and soon we were all talking with each other. After some hugs, we wished Cindy and her family off and we headed to Venice.


I had to laugh Friday after our return. The New York Times had a traveling article about riding on the long distance Amtrak trains. The author's experience completely mirrored our own. I will be the first to admit that in certain settings - I go into antisocial mode and really do not care to speak with anyone. i expected the train trip to be one of these times, where it would really be just Eric and I and the rest of the train could for all means, be empty so far as I was concerned. BUT IT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE.

Amtrak (1) Tom (0)

Amtrak touts the train trips as a social experience and they are right. “There Are No Strangers on a Train.” One way the train facilitates this with group dining. You are seated in groups of 4 - so naturally Eric and I were eating meals with new people 3 times a day.

I was not looking forward to this actually.

My experience has been one of initial greetings and then people across the table start doing the math on Eric and I and then get all rigid and stiff lipped. Not that i really care what anyone thinks, but it gets really tiring.

Our first dinner sorta followed the script. We sat with a couple from Fullerton who were very nice. They were on the way to Colorado Springs. The gentleman's father had just passed away and they were going to the funeral. The man spoke about how much he liked train travel but I really did not feel like they had much to say to us and I kept my best to keep the conversation going. The whole .. ask nice questions and do not expect any reciprocal interest in return game. Which was basically most of the dinner. Finally I inquired about the man's line of work and he replied he was a traveling salesman for a musical instrument distributor. From there the conversation picked up a bit and Eric and he discussed types of drums and symbols. The man was clearly impressed with Eric's knowledge and started to loosen up a bit. So the dinner ended up on a slight upshot.

[insert whimpy rant here ]

It would good to reflect on the dinner as a positive [ which it was ] but again - I do not have the energy any longer to help strangers with their Gay comfort level. I realize it is good to alter people's impressions and stereotypes - but it is like a tax burden straight people never have to deal with.

I should not complain. At my last job over the course of my first five years, barriers were knocked down and even the most conservative of my coworkers managed to set most of their bias aside and admit that they respected my work and actually liked me. But all that extra barrier breaking charm routine - takes a lot of energy and effort.

Things are much better these days I freely volunteer. But still.... 3 weeks ago in a lunch meeting at my new job, my inquisitive boss managed to ask out loud in front of everyone "so you are going with your girlfriend?" [on the trip] and I promptly put him off his track telling him that I was going with my partner Eric.

[ the whole rest of the room already knew ] but somehow the room got quiet as i replied.

So you can understand the antisocial mode sometimes. Which made the rest of our trip on the train a bit of a surprise. Our next morning breakfast we sat with a couple told us all about their anniversary trip and as it turns out - they lived in a town next to my hometown. and they knew my brother-in-law's nephew. Small world. It was really interesting.

After lunch, I spent 35 minutes in the lounge talking to 2 Amish famers about green technology and politics. [ seriously] The next day[?] in the lounge while I Photoshopped, an Amish group started singing for 35 minutes[?]. Eric did not quite care for it. I thought it was interesting. Though Eric's recording of it on his cellphone - does sound rather creepy.

Of course our dinner that night took the cake. We sat with an older couple on their way back from Albuquerque. They went for a visit and during the visit - they decided to move to the area and managed to buy a house! They were on their way back home to pack their stuff. These folks were definitely on their own reality plane, but it was a really good one. They also kept asking Eric and I if we were actors. And told us we looked liked actors. We tried to pop that bubble - but that did not happen. Mrs. went on to tell us later she would look for us in the movies but she figured we might change our names because movie stars do that.

I really want whatever cough syrup this lady was drinking. OF course - during the dinner conversation, we asked about their line of work and [ ta da] does the man tell us he is

an Elvis impersonator.

....and after spending 30 minutes with them, Eric and i did not even skip a beat. He even said he did Roy Orbson. Which I could totally believe. He even pulled out pictures for us.

You cannot for pay for this kinda of alter reality. Their sense of optimism was wonderful. It must have been through the train. Earlier that day Eric and I were in the lounge listening to a man tell the steward that he was moving his family to Phoenix and he just got a new job as a forklift operator at $16 a hour. He was very enthusiastic.

Then he mentioned that he has 11 children.

It must have been in the train tap water or something. I shoulda drank more of it.

At the end of our trip, we spotted our friends at the platform and exchanged hugs and wished them the best in New Mexico. Mrs. by now was referring to me as Tommy and told us that they would be looking for us [ in the movies?]

So despite my ranting, i think the train shaved off a layer or two of my antisocial jade. And still makes me smile.